I’m one of those individuals who is always trying to understand how my own mind works. I have this belief that the more I understand not only how I process information, but how I create either art or stories, it will allow me to do it better. Better is good…and we’ll ignore the poor grammar of that phrase, but accept that it’s a constant exploration of mine.
The question I’ve had as of late deals with the sudden upswing of posting to my blog. I’ve, on average, for the last few weeks posted 5 to 6 times a week. At first I thought it was the thrill of seeing who has liked my posts then the slow gradual incline of people wanting to follow my blog. It’s like wow, they think I have something cool to say. Either that or I’m entertaining. Not sure which, but last night I realized that it’s only the superficial reason. The vain part of me and the ego, but to be honest, that’s only a small thrill that isn’t enough to continue the upswing. (No offense gang, I really do appreciate it, honest)
So the question becomes, why? Why am I doing it? Why, when I woke up this morning, did I start composing a blog post in my head? Usually I go through a list of what I have to do which is a long-range of possible activities that I have to do. Write, business, house, kids, errands…any stay at home mom with kids understands this list to a degree. But for the last week, the first thought has been, what do I talk about in my blog today?
I figured it out this morning, which is normal for me because when I go to sleep with a question, I wake up with an answer (mostly, there are exceptions). My answer comes down to a belief that has been passed on to me from the countless writing books I’ve read over the years. Write every day. I have trouble writing on just one story every day. It’s part of how my mind works. As a multi-tasker naturally the idea of focusing completely on one task is a foreign object and doing it every day an aversion. It’s also part of the reason why I typically have more than one story going at a time. It’s who I am.
Understanding this about myself provides the answer as to why I keep posting, even if no one read my blog. It’s my daily writing exercise. Balance for me hinges on being able to have a steady diet of writing. I had thought that meant for my stories, but now I believe that writing of almost any nature helps me maintain the balance within myself. If I can get the words to scrawl across the screen easily at a pace that relieves the pressure in my mind, then yay for me. I can focus on the other parts of my day without the constant nag in the back of my mind saying “You have to write something.”
As for seeing the upswing and finding out that people want to keep coming back to read what I have to write, well that just makes the exercise enjoyable even more so. I appreciate the comments when I get them, and I freely admit that I check back often to see how many has liked my post. It may pale one day, but for now it causes me to grin like an idiot. It doesn’t change the reason I’m writing, but it does give me that bonus which is always fun.
So, thank you to my current followers, thank you to those that read and tell me that you like my post, and thank you to anyone in the future. I truly, and humbly (somewhat), thank you.