Move over, move over, send reality right over


Reality
Reality (Photo credit: Beatnic)

Reality Sucks!!!!  Oh, wait, you probably knew that.  Still, it felt good to say it.

Reality is a part of our existence that most don’t want to acknowledge.  Or, at least, I don’t want to acknowledge it.  The reality is that no matter how much money you have, it never seems enough.  That when you’re done paying the bills, you’re left wondering where did it all go.  We save (hopefully) until we spend that too.  Reality is a vicious cycle.

Reality is that we don’t get to pursue everything we want to.  We are forced to shunt our desires and wants to the side to do what needs to be done.  What I need doesn’t always mirror what I want.  Sometimes I get lucky, most of the time I don’t.  Last night we had a discussion with our daughter relating to this.  From her perspective, as parents, we get to do what we want because we’re calling the shots.  We decide what they’re eating, we decide on what can be watched, how long to play video games, what they can drink, how much candy they can have.  It’s not fair, because we can do what we want.  We explained that wasn’t the case, that we often have to sacrifice our wants and desires to be their parents.  Reality is about being mature.

Reality is that problems don’t fix themselves.  That no matter how much we wish a fairy would come along and wave a magic wand, the migraines won’t disappear, the weight won’t fade away, and the house won’t magically get cleaned.  We have to admit to the problem first, but once we do we have to fix it.  Reality is about responsibility.

Ugh, no wonder why people spend so much time avoiding reality.  As writers, we spend a fair bit of our time in a fantasy world so we can create stories.  We explore the trials and tribulations of fictional people so that we can avoid our own (at least that is my opinion).  We create situations that are worse than our own so we can continue to turn a blind eye to our reality.  Who wants to admit that they’re overweight, out of shape, or had put their writing career and aspirations on the back burner out of fear?  I don’t…

But I have to, because reality is all the things I mentioned above.  All three of those are my reality, there are more but I think my limit at the moment is three.  My illusions are comforting, like a warm blanket or my son’s Snoopy dog that is half his size (he’s 3’9″) named Baby who will hug me when I’m upset.  They are like the huge teddy bear Sweetheart I had that stood at 5′ when she could stand as a child.  They are safe, easy to accept.  Yeah, I like my delusions

Here’s the thing though:  When you choose to make a life change, you have to discard your illusions/delusions, put them on the back burner and take a hard look at your life.  Point out your faults, your weaknesses, and make a choice.  Keep the delusion or move forward.  I’ve chosen to move forward, to take a new and serious approach to my writing and my health.  I owe it to myself to be harsh in my judgement, to shunt my issues to the side and get something done.  It’s not easy and I’m only 7 days into this decision (I made it the night of August 1).  I’m struggling with an intense desire to fall back into my old patterns.

I can’t because reality is about change.

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